Have you ever compared yourself to someone else?
Perhaps, you’ve wondered why you weren’t more like another person. Have you ever questioned your own choices because of how you perceive another person’s life to be.
It’s human nature. We’ve all done it at one time or another.
There she was, this perfect woman dressed in perfect clothing sporting the perfect haircut. When she walked, her perfect children followed behind her. They were neat and clean, orderly and well behaved.
I remember thinking to myself, “How does she do it?” Whenever I saw her and her family, they were always on top of their game, laughing and smiling. They seemed like the happiest family on earth. I couldn’t imagine her nagging her children, arguing with her husband or even raising her voice.
Whenever I ran into this woman, I could feel my flaws pouring out. I felt her looking me over and her perfectness made me feel insecure. She was never anything but nice around me and that made it even worse.
I liked her, I just never felt comfortable being around her.
Do you know why? I was comparing myself to her.
This was a long time ago, when I really cared about what other people thought of me.
I don’t do this anymore.
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Maybe it’s my age, I’m forty-five now, or maybe it’s that I’ve gone through hard times that helped me see clearly what’s really important in my life. I’ve learned not to focus too much attention on what other people think of me.
Whatever it is, I’m happier because of it.
What another person is doing doesn’t really have anything to do with you. You have to do what feels right for you and your family. Plus, you never really know what goes on behind closed doors in another person’s life.
A few years ago, I was sorry to hear the woman I mentioned above was getting a divorce. When I heard this news, I was shocked. She was the last person I ever thought would get a divorce. She always seemed happy and content. Clearly, her life wasn’t as perfect as it seemed.
If you find yourself comparing yourself to other people, I encourage you to stop.
It’s not what other people think of you that truly matters. Instead, make sure you’re living authentically and honestly with yourself. Are you happy with the choices you’ve made? When you go to sleep at night, do you feel good about how you’ve spent your day? If the answer is “yes,” give yourself a big pat on the back and keep moving forward. If the answer is “no,” do something to change it.
Don’t waste your time comparing yourself to other people. Instead, figure out what is truly important to you and then formulate a plan to make it happen.
Find meaning each day,
Read my November column in Forsyth Woman, Take Time To Give Thanks
My recent Huffington Post article, 5 Ways To Help Your Self Esteem