Regrets. We all have them, although some people have more than others. I don’t think you can get through life without doing something you wish you could take back. Have a do over. Hit the reset button.

Wouldn’t that be nice? If something didn’t go the way you had hoped it would go, wouldn’t it be great if you could just hit the undo button and try again. No damage done. No apology necessary. Kind of like a return policy, but with no questions asked and no harm done.

Like the people who have them, regrets come in all sorts of sizes and shapes.

There’s the small regret: “I wish I hadn’t gone to that party” or “I wish I had prepared a little more before the meeting.” Simple little things maybe we wish we had done better or actually not done at all, but the damage isn’t so bad. You might not have all the answers during your meeting or you might not feel so good in the morning after a party, but it’s a short term issue. It will pass without any real harm done. It’s quickly forgotten.

The medium size regrets can be a little more painful and the damage a little more felt: “I really thought she was pregnant when I congratulated her” or “I didn’t realize I wasn’t suppose to tell you that.” Take it from me, congratulating someone on being pregnant isn’t the best thing to do, especially when the person isn’t pregnant. I’m not friends with someone anymore because she didn’t take this very well.

Then there’s the larger regret. The type of regret that can have a permanent impact on your life. Those are never good. “I don’t really want to be doing this job, living in this house, married to this person.”

Those regrets are the painful ones. The ones that find us living a life we don’t want to be living. These are the regrets that take courage and a little longer to work through. And sometimes, we don’t want to deal with them at all. So we don’t.

We try to dismiss them, ignore them, sweep them under the rug. These are the regrets that keep you up into the deep hours of the night and cause you to toss and turn.

But, here’s the thing: if you do have regrets, big or small, work through it to make peace with whatever it is.

Forgive yourself, apologize, move on and put it behind you. If you do have a bigger regret, something that’s preventing you from living the life you truly want to be living, you need to come to terms with it. Is there something you can do about it? Can you: look for a new job, sell the big house, work on your relationship?

Actively decide to do something about it, or not, but recognize either way, you’re making a decision. You have a choice.

We all feel remorse for something, it’s just part of the experience of life. However, you don’t want to look back one day and regret not doing anything about whatever it is you regret.

Don’t let your past mistakes steal your joy.

Find meaning each day,

Dara

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