Have you ever been faced with an issue and not known what to do? A problem, dilemma, conflicting scenario?

I’m sure you have. We all have.

It’s normal for life to present issues and for us to sometimes feel conflicted about which way to go. Which decision to make. Which choice to choose.

We feel conflicted because we don’t want to make a mistake. We don’t want to make the wrong choice or look back a week, a year, five years from now, and have regrets.

Living with regret is a sure way to suck the joy and happiness from our lives.

There are different kinds of decisions to be made: what to serve for dinner, which job to take, what course of treatment to pursue, who to walk down the aisle with. Some decisions are simple, the consequences insignificant and short lived. Other decisions feel heavier to make and come with the possibility of permanency. The stakes are higher and the outcome important.

If you find yourself struggling with a decision, and you aren’t sure which way to go, here are a few thoughts:

DO NOTHING

You heard me. Do nothing. If you can’t decide what to do, and you’ve been thinking about a particular decision and just can’t come up with which direction to move toward, do nothing. Sit with it. For a day. A week. A month. Especially if there isn’t a time issue lurking. If however, you do have a time parameter, at least take a couple of days, sleep on it, and then move in the direction that feels the best.

TALK IT THROUGH

It’s always helpful to chat up a problem with someone you trust. A person who isn’t necessarily going to tell you what

you want to hear, but what you need to hear. I value the opinions of people I know I can trust to tell me like it is. Don’t ask someone who’s just going to blow a bunch of sunshine up your ass. Instead, seek out a person who will take the time to talk through whatever you’re struggling with, and help you get perspective.

GO WITH YOUR GUT

It’s hard when we don’t know what to do. It can feel heavy on our shoulders and cause us to feel off balance. Sometimes, you have to make a decision and you truly don’t know what to do. Wouldn’t it be nice if we had a glass ball and we could look into it and see how different decisions would be played out? I hate to burst your bubble, but we don’t. Instead, you have to trust your gut. Listen to yourself. Do the best you can with the facts you have. When all else fails, I always make a decision based on what feels right. I follow my instincts, and most of the time I’m happy with the end result.

LET IT GO

Once you make a decision, let it go. Stop going over the facts again and again. Make peace with whatever you end up deciding. Whatever happens, don’t punish yourself if things don’t work out the way you had hoped. Remember: you did the best you could with the facts you had, and once you make a decision, let go of stressing yourself out about it.

SCREW REGRET

We’ve all made a decision and then wished we’d gone a different route. This happens when things don’t go the way we wanted them to go. When we recognize the choice we made might not have been the right one. Hindsight can fill you with regret and weigh you down. Don’t let it. Whatever ever happens, you made the best decision you could. If things don’t play out the way you wanted them to, learn from the situation, and move on. Living with regret won’t do anything but suck the joy from your life.

We’re all faced with difficult choices and we have to make decisions that feel heavy on our shoulders.

Being conflicted about a particular situation isn’t fun for anyone. It’s also how we learn. Remember this the next time you’re faced with a tough decision. Trust yourself, do the best you can, and always keep perspective.

Find meaning each day,

Dara

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