Instead of Laughs, I got the Middle Finger

A few weeks ago, because of school conferences, my kids didn’t have classes. I was so looking forward to spending time with them. I cleared my calendar to make sure I was available for a lazy, fun, and relaxing day together. I didn’t want anything to get in the way of our day. Our special time.

I envisioned a long leisurely lunch, maybe at one of our favorite restaurants, followed by a little shopping, and then home for a chick flick on the couch.

It sounded good to me.

I was excited about it.

My daughters were excited about it.
We had teacher conferences to attend, and a few commitments, but there was plenty of time to execute my plan, talk, and laugh together. It was a cold and rainy day. Even better to bring out the snuggles when we curled up on the sofa to watch our movie. I had our Netflix account all set.

But sadly, this is not what happened.

Instead of talking, we had yelling. Instead of snuggles, we had tears. Instead of laughs, I got the middle finger.

Clearly, not the day I had planned.

While I watched the drama unfold from one child, the other was locked in her room doing homework.

I’m all about maximizing our time together, making memorable moments, and having fun.

blog insert 2And I was not having fun.

Not at all.

The picture in my mind of the way I wanted the day to go was completely shut down. In under five minutes. But you know what? That’s just how it is sometimes. Sometimes we fight, argue, and things don’t go the way we want them to go. We have good times and not so good times, and it is what it is.

And it’s OK.

It’s easy to want everything to go as planned, and to be clean and tidy. However, the reality is, sometimes we get flicked off by our daughter, and we have to deal with it.

Being able to go with the flow, handle setbacks, and keep things REAL is paramount to maintaining sanity when raising kids.

And that make believe fairly tale picture you have in your head, about the way things “should” go…ditch it. It will only cause you to feel badly when life gets in the way. And I can promise you life will get in the way. Often.

As for the punishment, well, technology is a parent’s dream when it comes to finding things to take away.

The options are endless!

When I was a child, I got my mouth washed out with soap. No need for that now. Not being able to text friends, well, it’s almost enjoyable to watch how upsetting this is to my daughters. After all, I did get the middle finger. I deserved a little entertainment.

Find meaning each day,



  1. Laura on May 13, 2015 at 10:04 am

    I have a feeling I know someone who could relate pretty well to this!! Thank goodness for all the selfless and strong moms out there.

  2. Margaret on May 13, 2015 at 10:14 am

    Love, love, love the part about taking away stuff and being entertained by the pouty kid who flipped you off!! OMG Love this!

  3. Abbie Gale on May 13, 2015 at 4:39 pm

    Yep, times two with twins. I have been told we will all like each other again soon. I also am having our attorney draw up papers for our youngest to sign promising he will never act like a 15 year old when he is 15. Mine didn’t do the finger but spelled out a cuss word at me. I almost fell to the floor laughing. They are all good kids. They are just possessed by brain chiggers for a bit.

    • Dara Kurtz on May 13, 2015 at 5:15 pm

      Yes, all good kids, for sure!