Be careful what you wish for, because it might just come true.
Over a year ago I was taking a walk by myself. Life was feeling hectic and I was tired of rushing around all the time. To be honest, I wanted to make some changes.
I felt off balance.
I was running from one place to another, and going from one activity to the next. I wasn’t happy doing this, and I knew deep down inside the solution was to quit my job.
A job I loved. A job I didn’t want to quit.
I started my first job in high school, have always worked, and loved it. Working was part of me. Part of my identity.
I remember saying to myself on that walk, and I can even tell you the exact location where I had this thought:
“The only way I’m going to have the courage to make a change is if something major happens in my life. Like if I got sick.”
There it is.
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After I had this thought, I immediately told myself I was completely insane. Of course I didn’t want to get sick. Of course I didn’t want anything bad to happen. I wasn’t completely crazy. I knew deep down that I wanted to change what I was doing in my life.
I didn’t have the courage to do it.
Unless life dealt me something major, something that forced me to take a good look at what I was doing and how I was spending my time, I wasn’t going to rock the boat. The boat felt safe. I was used to the boat.
Less than six weeks later I was diagnosed with breast cancer.
I won’t bore you with all the details of the year following this news, what I went through, or how hard it still was for me to decide to leave my job.
What I will tell you, is that I’m happier today than I’ve ever been in my life. Maybe it’s because I have a deep appreciation for the gift of life. Or because after what I went through and the people I met on my journey, I have a clear understanding of how lucky I am.
Or maybe it’s because I’m doing what I’ve always wanted to do. Everyday.
It’s probably a combination of all of these things.
But what I do know for sure, is that if there’s something you feel in your gut you want to be doing, figure out a way to do it. Now. Don’t make yourself wait until something happens. Don’t put off giving yourself permission to do the things you truly want to do. Figure out a way. There’s always a way.
Whatever you do, be careful what you wish for, because it might just come true.
Find meaning each day,