Are You Your Worst Enemy?

Have you ever sabotaged your own joy because you didn’t think you deserved to have something work out the way you wanted it to work out? Maybe you didn’t think you were entitled to be happy? Or worthy? You probably didn’t even realize you were doing it.

I’ve noticed this pattern in a close friend, recently, and I had to point it out to her.

She was her own worst enemy.

She didn’t want to hear it, but I owed it to her to tell her. I was used to seeing the same pattern. When things started working out in her favor, she was quick to find a reason to shut it down. It’s almost as if her life was going too well, and she couldn’t stand it.

Subconsciously, of course.

If work was going well, she’d find a reason to complain. If her relationship was moving forward, she’d find something wrong with him. I knew I could count on her to always find a problem even if everything was going perfectly well.

Because she didn’t think she deserved to be happy.

When I pointed this out to her, she wasn’t defensive. In fact, she was relieved to discuss it. And I’m glad she was willing.

We can be our worst enemies. We can be nice, kind, and thoughtful to everyone around us, but when it comes to ourselves, well, not so much. We tend to be harder on ourselves, less patient, and extremely critical.

Why is this?

Processed with VSCOcam with hb2 presetWe should be cheering ourselves on, accepting of our weaknesses, and focusing on our strengths. But we don’t.

Until now.

Let’s make an honest decision to stop being so hard on ourselves. All of us.

Just like my friend, you do deserve good things to come your way, to be happy each day, to feel contentment and joy. But you have to believe you deserve these things, in order for you to have them.

Those who think they should, do. Those who think they can, will. Those who think they won’t, are right.

It has to start from within. No one can do it for you. And that little voice we all have inside of us, the one that sometimes says unkind words. You have to make a conscious effort to turn it off when it starts being negative. You have to pay attention, listen, and then shut it down when it starts being detrimental.

Because you’re in charge of the little voice in your head, and you get to decide what it says, and what you listen to.

Be your biggest fan, believe you deserve all the blessings in your life, and expect good things to come your way.

And I know they will.

Find meaning each day,

Dara

 

 

2 Comments

  1. Tina on June 3, 2015 at 9:07 am

    Yep, been guilty of this myself, a lot of nature and nurture taught me to think like this! For some it is a little beyond just a a self pep talk, it takes a lot of work to retrain your thinking. Though you are right, we all deserve to have the best in life and not self sabotage our drems! What a great read for the day Dara!!



  2. Margaret on June 3, 2015 at 9:43 am

    Love this down to earth wisdom. I like the idea of just turning down (or off) the little negative voice in our heads. 🙂